Eve

Our young Eve

Gertrude.  Guinevere.  Minerva.  Beatrice.  Eve.

The systematic process of deciding upon a name for the new female Great Dane puppy that would be joining our family took several days.  There was one criteria of which Kyle was confident: it must be an old-fashioned woman’s name.  The final effort involved several long lists culled from online databases and note-taking on scraps of legal pad.  Kyle decided upon Eve because it met the original requirement while possessing a bit of modern zeal.

Though not planned at the time, we have occasionally expanded it to “Evelyn!”  –usually when she tested our patience.

Eve came to us from a breeder in Alabama.  She joined Link, a puppy two weeks her elder who had only recently been picked up from Kentucky.  The pair came at an interesting moment; Kyle and I were moving in together after two years of dating.  Moving from a 400 square foot one-room white prison to a 3-bedroom sunlight-filled unit with a partner and two puppies was nothing short of revolutionary.  My shift from permanent student to adult was crystallizing.  In many ways I could envision dating events in my life as either before the dogs or after.

The two pups have spent 1/3 of their lives snuggling together.

Typical snuggle position

Perhaps due to the fact that I know I will likely never have biological children (or be able to legally adopt), part of me thought that the dogs represented the most encompassing care-taking responsibility with which I’d ever be tasked.  The dogs became a centerpiece of my life.   Virtually all decisions included consideration of the Link and Eve factor.  What color covers to get for couches?  Black and tan to match the pups.  Which coffee shop to go to?  The Starbucks on the corner so we can sit outside with the pups.  What to do tonight?  Stay in, because I don’t want to leave the pups alone that long.

They went with us everywhere allowable, and our destinations were usually decided based on whether they could come.

We were a four-person family.

If it was possible for them to join us, they did.

This week was set to mark an important date in puppydom: yesterday, March 18th, was Link’s first birthday.  Per usual we expected to use the occasion to slather added praise, hugs, and kisses, and buy unnecessarily more dog toys.  I wouldn’t have been surprised if we manufactured a picture involving the one-year old pup in a birthday hat, perhaps including cake.

Unfortunately, that did not happen.  Instead of puppy-induced laughter, yesterday was filled with puppy-based sadness.  The internal medicine specialist at the Chicago Emergency Veterinary Clinic called to explain the biopsy results from two days prior:

Eve has bladder cancer.

Eve after the biopsy--she's not a fan of anesthesia

The call was the culmination of three weeks of vet visits where we were given various maladies as the “likely” cause of Eve’s urinary problems: an infection; a more serious infection needing stronger antibiotics; bladder stones; a fungus; then, cancer.  More information needs to be culled before an accurate prognosis can be made.  The initial comments on the subject are not encouraging.  With the typical surgery + chemo routine we can roughly expect Eve to live an additional 9 to 12 months from today.  There is a new non-invasive surgical option that could extend that time, but we won’t know anything concrete until talking with more experts in the coming week.

Last week--Eve & Dad

From this point forward our task is reasonably clear: do all in our power to help the gal medically while doing all in our power to enjoy the moments we have left as a foursome.  The medical part is easy: we will do what the doctors tell us as much as finances and her standard of living allow.  Harder, I worry, will be savoring our remaining time while allowing minimal sadness to seep in.

Today we spent several sunny hours in a nature preserve playing fetch, walking the trails, wading in the river, and even barking as two deer crossed our path.  The hidden invaders current affect on Eve’s body is somewhat minimal–she remains perfectly capable of running at a full sprint after Link, eating favorite snacks with gusto, giving full-face licks, snuggling intensely, and doing all things that make her immensely lovable.

Today--wrestling in the park

Today--group shot

Eve is blissfully unaware that life ends at all–let alone that nature decided her life will be particularly short.  The burden of knowing falls on us.  I don’t want the knowledge to affect all the happy moments we still have left, but my mind is already falling for the trap.

Two weeks from now, April 1st, will be Eve’s first birthday.  This “first” for Eve may also be a “last.”   Many of the new things that we do from this point on will be both a first and a last.

I worry about Link.  He has not been away from Eve for more than 2 hours at any time in his entire life.  What will he do alone?

Damn depressing thoughts.

Within minutes of first meeting

Today--always a happy duo

It is all too new to have any real pronouncements about the “lessons” that can be taken from this sad news.  There will be a time for that.  Right now the task is entirely centered on maximizing happy moments without dwelling on the future.  We will do our best.

Anew

The first post on this blog was on June 11, 2008.  It featured a countdown of my three favorite versions of the song “Hallelujah” (k.d. lang coming out ahead).  622 posts later–by no means consistently added–the blog was essentially retired with a post on Christmas Day 2009.

It’s time for a meager re-birth.

Contemplating the end of what I consider the third chapter in my life (growing up, life in Champaign, law school)*, now seems an apt time to recommit to a bit of self reflection.  This space might serve that purpose.

I’ve yet to fully appreciate how much life has changed in the last few years.  That’s a bit untrue. Day to day life is not all that different.  What’s different is my perception of my future.  Where I’ll be living, what I’ll be learning, what I’ll be dreaming at the age of 26 is nothing I would have guessed at the age of 23.

It’s all quite exciting.

P.S.  Looking at the new header, it now seems way too grad-student, self-important, philosophical-like.  It needs lightening up.  I’ll get to that eventually.

* To be condensed into one chapter once the book gets longer.

Marching On

This video was powerful.  Great song.

Return to the Middle Ages

One thing always brings me back to reality when I  feel blue about the jagged pace of equality in America: I could have been born somewhere else.

For example, Uganda.

Here I am whining about my government telling me that I am unfit to marry.  Big deal.  Across the pond in the middle of the African continent, people are  fighting off utter annihilation.  I kid you not.

The nation of  Uganda is  in the news these days because its politicians are considering what crazy liberals have dubbed the “Kill Gays” bill.

Uganda already punishes homosexuality with life imprisonment.  But is life imprisonment really the best way to deal with those pesky gays?  I mean, they clog up the prisons and still infect society with their gayness.  Gay people still exist in Uganda, so the gayness must seep through those prison walls.  As a solution, noble Ugandan politicans are insisting that the punishment for “aggravated homosexuals” be death.  That’s right.  The answer they have come up with  is to just Kill ‘Em.

There is more.  Just killing the aggravated gays isn’t exactly change that Ugandans can believe in.  I mean,  going from life in prison to the death penalty doesn’t send as strong a message as they’d like.   And they can’t exactly kill the gays twice.  So what else can they do to really send the message that Uganda is a gay-free zone?   Hmmm.  Well, they could always punish the friends of gay people.  So that is what they are also proposing.  Supporting a homosexual will get you 7 to 10  years in the slammer.  Should do the trick, don’t you think?   Yep.

But wait, there is even more.  They really, really, really want to make sure that people are actually caught breaking these new laws.  What fun are new laws if they are never used?  So, those crafty Ugandans are now making it illegal to not turn someone in if you know they are breaking the gay laws.  If you see two ladies kissing through a bedroom window, you’ve got 24 hours to call the police to turn them in.  Otherwise, 7 to 10 years for you as well.

To recap:

(1) Kill the gays

(2) 7 to 10 years for friends of gay people

(3) 7 to 10 years for anyone who knows a gay or a friend of a gay and fails to turn them in.

In one month we will have already finished a decade of the 20th century.  2010.  Lest we forget, however, some corners of this globe are drifting back to the mindset of 1010.

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: Your perspective in life changes forever when you realize millions of people would see that you are slaughtered simply because you exist.

God Bless America.

We Carry On

Dust off and fight on.  New Jersey is next.

Here’s an ad from marriage supporters….

One Step Back

Friends console one another after learning about the unofficial defeat on Question 1 at election night headquarters in Portland, Maine, early Wednesday morning, Nov. 4, 2009. Maine voters decided decide to rescind the Legislature's approval of same-sex marriage.(AP Photo/Pat Wellenbach)

Thousands of Maine citizens woke up today with less rights than they did when they went to sleep.  The voters of the state approved a measure that took back the right of gay couples to marry that the legislature had passed months ago.  Round we go again…

The ‘For the Children’ ads apparently did the trick, as in California.  The  big story from this will likely be the role played by the Catholic Church in the effort to repeal marriage rights.  The Church was the largest donor to the effort, invoking much controversy when they passed the plate in several weekend services specifically to help run the ads that you see in previous posts.  Again, I have no words.

A group that does have words, however, are the folks at Liberty Counsel, explaining their joy at their “victory” in Maine yesterday.  Does this talk actually appeal to decent human beings?

“There’s good news and bad news here,” said Barber. “The good news is that even in one of the most liberal States in the Union, Maine, the people have once again rejected the ridiculous and oxymoronic notion of ‘same sex marriage.’ The momentum has again shifted – hopefully for good this time – in favor of protecting legitimate marriage.

“A counterfeit is a counterfeit. An orange is an orange no matter how much you want it to be a turnip. This isn’t about ‘marriage.’ It’s about hurting and broken people desperately seeking affirmation of an objectively deviant lifestyle. One that, even in their heart of hearts, they know to be a dead end. As for the militant ‘No on 1’ homosexual activists? I’m reminded of spoiled children dressing up and playing house, refusing to come in when mom calls for dinner”. [...]

“This is an historic battle for the minds and souls of our children – for our very culture. The mealy-mouthed approach must end. This is not just about ‘marriage.’ It has everything to do with forced affirmation of homosexuality – under penalty of law.

No Words

The vote for marriage equality in Maine draws near.  Polls show a deadlock, 48% to 48%.  As a refresher, the Maine legislature passed a bill legalizing gay marriage.  The governor signed it, making it law.  Shortly after, a citizen referendum was spearheaded to overturn the legislative decision.

Opponents of same-sex marriage have released two more ads.  I have no words.  Confession: my ability to offer any sort of objective comment on these things has long ago disappeared.  To me, these are hateful, sad displays that will be cringed at years from now.   But that could simply be a product of my clear bias.  Consider for yourself, I suppose…

In The Beginning

At least this ridiculous ad currently running in Washington doesn’t hide the fact that it thinks one particular religious view should be mandated upon the entire state…

Sacred Ground from Protect Marriage Washington on Vimeo.

NOlympics

KG, Paul, and random stranger hold up Olympic rings on Daley Plaza

No words need typing to describe the saddness that befell all of us on Daley Plaza the moment we learned that our beloved city was eliminated from contention for hosting 2016′s biggest party.  On the first round.

Other have already typed the words: stunned, shocked, disgusted, flabbergasted…

Other have already given the rallying cry: keep our heads up, funnel the energy, move on stronger…

Personally, my spirits returned quickly without need for the generic rallying cry.  For that, I know exactly who I need to thank:  The Cubs.  A lifetime as a Cubs fan is a lifetime of preparation for these moments. A Cubs fan knows disappointment and knows how to find strength and sucess in spots where others fail to see any.  We don’t just say these cliches…we live them.

Competition is about stepping into the stadium at the beginning, not holding the trophy at the end.

Losing once is not losing forever, no matter how much it may seem that way.

Victory can be achieved by keeping faith in the face of arrogant winners.

Go Chicago Go.

So Close…

The countdown to the Olympic announcement inches forward.  The current tally: 9 hours, 8 minutes, 2 seconds.

I have been scanning new stories on a continual basis to get the buzz.  The cliff noted findings: Very very close, but if forced to pick just one, odds makers say Chicago wins.  However, experts also note that front-runner status at the very end is often a negative characteristic.  Oy.